June To-do

I recently saw a few other bloggers write a to-do list for June! And I thought it would be a great idea for me to do the same. Whilst we are ten days into the month I still thought id write down my goals in the hope I follow them!

May was not the best of months for me and I’m determined to move forward and make sure I really look after myself in the next few months. 

It’s the first full month off of uni since finishing my third year and I feel relief like never before, there are things you stop doing when you get super busy with deadlines like self care days or just having a proper clean and organisation of your room. 

July is pretty exciting for me and lucie (my bff and house-mate) we get to move into a new house!! So my first to do of June will be to get ORGANISED in order to make the move as less painful as I can!  Ebay is on the agenda in order to downsize a bit more before we move! So I’ll be doing that for the next two weeks! 

The next thing will be self care! A lot of the time I look after myself by working out, I often spend the time in the gym writing more to do lists and reflecting on things! Because of uni and a little mental health holiday I’ve taken a step back and I am SO ready to get back in the gym. But I also find the gym a great way to switch off! I often just go to spinning and just go for it and not think for a while! It makes you feel physically and mentally refreshed! 

Another thing I want to do in terms of self care is BLOGGING! Sometimes it gets to a point when you’re so busy with the rest of life that I can’t spend the time writing posts! But I love doing it and I really find that it’s great for my wellbeing to get my thoughts out and use my brain in a way that is reflective and thoughtful! 

So whilst I’m the gym the next week or so I’ll be compiling a list of blog posts to write!! I’ve got a research based one on the works which is deffo going to be finished soon.. she says.. as well as wanting to do some more makeup ones as I’ve got a few new pieces I wanna review! 

So overall my June to do list is to: 

• Organise and pack up my stuff for the move! 
• Focus on the Gym. 
• Write more blog posts! 

Life currently

My third year of uni has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I have consolidated friendships, met new inspiring people, succeeded with my degree, continued my fitness journey and all in all experienced a new kind of happiness that I haven’t felt before. 

But underlying that I have been struggling, it has not all been easy. I am currently dealing with an emotion that I have never dealt with before. An emotion that seems to consume me when I least expect it. 

Grief. 

An emotion that everyone deals with in their own way. 

Whilst I am grateful for the fact that I am 21 and have gone this far without feeling this kind of pain for a loved one, it still has not made the experience any easier. I have experienced heart break, I have experienced  anxiety and now I have undergone a season of grief. And whilst all I have expressed my emotion in a similar way I understand that all have effected me in entirely different ways. 

I have learnt so much during this season, but most of all I’ve learnt that for me it was a process. I went through a period of intense denial. With living away from home I could easily shut myself off to what was happening, I had the ability to somewhat push aside my emotions and carry on. Which I did for quite a few months. Because I wasn’t living in the situation, surrounded by my family who were all undergoing the same process, I could shut it out. 

I can’t decide wether this was particularly a good way of coping or not, my focus was not on my well being more so on getting through my third year of uni. 

When I finally had was put in a situation where I had to face my emotions I continued to shut off, I came back to uni, and then I eventually broke. I remember feeling this incredible pain, and waking up for days just crying. And whilst I wasent grieving due to the individual still being present, I was grieving the inevitable. 

As soon as I acknowledged this emotion it has been more difficult than ignoring the situation. I am a particularly emotional person anyway, but recently I haven’t  been able too control these emotions. one phone call with my sister or my mum. Or simply a text could lead to me breaking down in a very public place like the library or work. THIS IS OKAY. You are allowed to express your emotions. You are allowed to feel the way you feel. 

I am now in a place where I am ready for the next stage. I have dealt with this experience very separately from my family and now I understand that that was my coping mechanism. But for now to get through this I know that this is what will make my family stronger. Do not distance yourself from the people who care the most. Because they are your biggest anchor. 

I have been fortunate enough to have an amazing group of freinds who have supported me in many ways, wether they knew what I was going through or not. Just then supporting me as an individual, taking time for me has been enough. This is where I strongly believe in surrounding yourself with individuals who take the time to be with you. Who uplift your life, who don’t bring negativity because when you are experiencing any painful emotion, people who pull you down are not the types of individuals you need in your life when your going through a hard season. Friends shouldn’t make your life harder. 

So my three points- 

• Allow yourself time to breathe, you shouldn’t go through life not dealing with your emotions or looking after yourself. Have a cry. Have a you day. You are allowed to spend a day looking after your soul. 
• Do not push your family away. It’s easy especially when you live miles away to distance yourself. DONT. have those phone calls with your mum tell her your thoughts and feelings, it might be painful, it might be hard to talk about emotions that you don’t truly understand but it is healthy. 
• GET RID OF TOXIC ENERGY. I have really learnt that negativity wether it’s people that stress you out or situations which don’t make you feel good, GET RID. Be selfish, walk away. You are doing what you need to do for yourself. Obviously don’t be a bitch about it but your emotions your well being is the most important thing. 

I actually wrote this two months ago.. and since I have had a breakdown but I have also pulled myself up and feel stronger and happier than I’ve ever felt before, with a great support system and so many exciting things planned for the rest of the year. Yes I’m still upset over losing  a loved one but I’m learning to cope with it, and learning not to take life for granted. 

I am trying to make sure that I buy more transitional pieces that make up a more capsule wardrobe. (a few of these are but a few are not because well, its summer and I love summery clothes to much)

 The first two pieces (First two on the left) I think are relatively transitional JDY pink lace Cami and the Bershka jumpsuit, as the cami can be worn on nights out whether its the summer or winter and the Bershka jumpsuit would look super cute with a white t-shirt underneath, a jumper or a big coat over top! 

However, the pink fill playsuit and the sage green jumpsuit, both of which are ASOS own brand,  are perhaps slightly less transitional, more spring summer items! But I am just loving cute frilly clothing at the moment and the colours of these two are so beautiful!

I am obviously very obsessed with shoes, due to being a shopaholic and working in a place where I am surrounded by them, so obviously had to include a few that I have got my eye one! 

I know Warehouse also do a version of these Leopard cross over sandals but I found these on Asos and I am in love. With a really simple outfit, these will look lovely but right on trend with the animal print. 

These wedges are perfect, I just love the lace up detail, but also the height of the wedge is spot on. I had my eye on some Carvela ones but these with the discount work out so much better value for money! 

 I also love a cute espadrille, whilst I can't quite afford the Chanel ones (as much as id love them) these Asos pretty pastel pink with metallic toe are still really lovely. 

I obviously had to include a bodysuit and this one is not only a bodysuit, but its also my favorite colour and one shoulder, which I am OBSESSED with. This Boohoo pink bodysuit ticks all of my boxes and the material is described as 'bandage' so I know it's not going to be cheap looking! 

Another off the shoulder top, this Asos One shoulder Lilac crop top is a super lovely colour and would look perfect for nights out or just with blue mom jeans in the summer! 

Finally, yet another bodysuit but its halterneck! This Newlook Bodysuit looks lovely paired with shorts (as seen on the model) but also, of course, mom jeans and skirts it would look cute with and the fact that its halterneck just screams summer to me! Deffo a must have for this season. 

I obviously have so much more in my saved but these are some of my favorites! Hopefully, you can pick up some of your saved items with the discount code, save yourself some money and add to your summer wardrobe!!